Date: 6th July 2008 at 12:46pm
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Now that Sam Allardyce`s career in football is over, the ex-Bolton and Newcastle boss is turning to comedy. What`s funny is down to opinion. Some still like mother-in-law jokes, others prefer a more sophisticated approach. Whatever the style, the humour needs to be intentional, and that`s where Sam is going wrong at the moment. His outpourings on Joey Barton prove the point. Allardyce feels that Jailbird Joey should be given another chance – the 87th of his professional career.

If Newcastle sack him, then it will be another punishment and defeat the objective of Joey trying to put things right and become a better person,` he told the National, a newspaper published in the Middle East.

‘It could also be dangerous to take away football from him. He is a complete football man. His life revolves around it, there’s nothing else.`

From where we`re looking, there appear to be other things, Sam. Lager and violence for a start.

‘Without it he could re-offend and, even worse, go into a depression,` he continued.

Sounds good to us. The depression bit anyway.

‘We’ve had people in the past committing suicide because they could not cope with life after professional football.`

Anyone think that the gene pool minus Joey Barton would be a bad thing?

‘When I signed Joey I knew about his troubles. I had asked about him and I asked him directly. He told me he was working on his problems, like alcohol, and getting expert help at the Sporting Chance clinic.`

What a stunning success that has been.

Next week, Sam explains that Atilla the Hun was a really nice lad, who had a rough deal from the tabloids.

 

3 Replies to “Stop it Sam. Our Sides are Aching.”

  • one other thing: he’s off to an excellent career as a criminal. maybe he’ll work his way up to more sophisticated violent crimes such as robbery. ultimate aspirations are to commit treason, although he’s too dumb and doesn’t know what treason is anyway.

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