Date: 27th November 2015 at 10:24am
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Anthony Hart has some more ‘breaking news’ to report

Questions are being raised about the state of Bolton Wanderers’ communications department after revelations came to light that Eddie Davies said back in 2009 that all debt owed to him would not have to be paid back, but everyone forgot to put out a statement.

After years of a memo being left on a desk, an interview with Trevor Birch on the club website confirmed on Monday that Davies would write off £185 million worth of loans should someone be stupid enough to buy the club.

‘Eddie said he’d do this years ago, and asked Phil to ask the press officer to ask the club journalist to put out a statement,’ said an anonymous source. ‘But somewhere along the line communication broke down. To be fair, I think we were too busy sorting out the loan deal for Ariza Makukula that afternoon.’

News of the write-off has also angered the national media, who now have no idea what angle to take when they actually deem Bolton to be newsworthy.’

‘I’m absolutely flummoxed,’ said one journalist at the Daily Mail. ‘Last season, we could just mention the aggregate age of Emile Heskey and Eidur Gudjohnsen. Then Eidur left. We then went back to the debt line, it’s served us well over the years. We didn’t bother using context of course, just take a point and if you hammer it home people will believe it. Look what we did with the immigrants. But yeah, we can’t talk about the debt now. Err, you’re not going to print the immigrants bit right? I have a family to feed.’

‘Bolton are going to be debt free after the takeover. But what they’ve also got to worry about is the debt. Sorry, force of habit,’ said Mark Lawrenson on Football Focus.


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